I spoke to the manager, and as of Oct 1st, I have a 1 BR apartment on the first floor. That means I don't have to worry about getting home if the elevator goes out. It also means I can't leave my sliding door open all the time for air!
She's going to give me the keys in the next few days after the renovations are complete (it's getting a brand new rug). So I can start moving small things in there. This is good it will help establish where things go. Since I can't be in 2 places at once on the first, I'm going to post index cards on the walls, indicating where everything goes, like Couch Goes HERE, Coffee table goes here (and the table will have one saying This side out, with an arrow). The few days extra will also give me time to set up my apartment so it's not 'backwards' again, and my desk is near the internet outlet.
The problem with the situation is going to be money. I'm on a fixed income. After I pay my bills, I have $15 a mont to live on. I'm going to have to rely on sources like food pantries. When I apply for medicaid, I'm also going to apply for foodstamps, don't if I'll get them or not.
I'm looking for a part time job. I can't work more than 15 hours without losing my disability, but a few hundred dollars a month will make a huge difference in my lifestyle, I'll be able to get a TV signal for instance, right now I can't afford TV, and I'm not sure I'll be able to afford internet. For me, that would be a tragedy, since I'm home most of the time, losing my internet would isolate me from the world.
We'll see what happens. I'll keep the internet if I can. P is being incredibly helpful, he's wonderful. Since I do the Tigger/Eeyore thing, I've decided he's Pooh Bear, the one constant in my life. He's very special to me, and I don't know what I would do without his friendship.
Physically, I feel better, though I'm in a manic phase and not sleeping terribly well. I took a sleeping pill last night, and I guess my body fought it off or something. I have 8-12 weeks to wait for a psych consult. I wonder if I'll still be manic then? The longest I've ever been manic was about 6 months in 1999. I don't want to try to match or beat it. But I wasn't diagnosed or on meds then so maybe this will help.
Oddly, I'm fairly calm. I know I made the right decision to come here, and even though things are frantic at this point, they will calm down. I need to get some resume paper so I can send out my resume to local answering services and call centers. The problem will be getting 15 hours, most places want their part-time workers to work 20, which I can't do. Every dollar I earn over a pre-set limit deducts TWO dollars from my disability...I'd be slitting my own throat!
I wish I could go back to work full time, but even working part time is going to be a major challenge. I can't sit in any chair but my soft recliner for any length of time, so I'll have to work between standing up and moving (standing still hurts like the devil), or sitting for short periods (no more than a half-hour). I know the expert at my Social Security hearing said I couldn't work at all, and that makes me feel useless, a burden to society, but I'm learning and growing. I can go back to school next year (OH requires 1 year residency before getting in-state tuition), and eventually I'll have my degree in a field I CAN work in. Of course, I'll be in my 60's, but it's important to me to be productive.
In general, I'm happy. I still hurt, but usually my stress level is pretty low here (except for the past few days...wonder if that triggered my manic?)
I miss my friends in IL. I've written back to everyone who wrote to me, in email or on Facebook.
Well, I guess that's it for now. I'll post before the end of the month and let you know if I'll have internet after the 30th.
She's going to give me the keys in the next few days after the renovations are complete (it's getting a brand new rug). So I can start moving small things in there. This is good it will help establish where things go. Since I can't be in 2 places at once on the first, I'm going to post index cards on the walls, indicating where everything goes, like Couch Goes HERE, Coffee table goes here (and the table will have one saying This side out, with an arrow). The few days extra will also give me time to set up my apartment so it's not 'backwards' again, and my desk is near the internet outlet.
The problem with the situation is going to be money. I'm on a fixed income. After I pay my bills, I have $15 a mont to live on. I'm going to have to rely on sources like food pantries. When I apply for medicaid, I'm also going to apply for foodstamps, don't if I'll get them or not.
I'm looking for a part time job. I can't work more than 15 hours without losing my disability, but a few hundred dollars a month will make a huge difference in my lifestyle, I'll be able to get a TV signal for instance, right now I can't afford TV, and I'm not sure I'll be able to afford internet. For me, that would be a tragedy, since I'm home most of the time, losing my internet would isolate me from the world.
We'll see what happens. I'll keep the internet if I can. P is being incredibly helpful, he's wonderful. Since I do the Tigger/Eeyore thing, I've decided he's Pooh Bear, the one constant in my life. He's very special to me, and I don't know what I would do without his friendship.
Physically, I feel better, though I'm in a manic phase and not sleeping terribly well. I took a sleeping pill last night, and I guess my body fought it off or something. I have 8-12 weeks to wait for a psych consult. I wonder if I'll still be manic then? The longest I've ever been manic was about 6 months in 1999. I don't want to try to match or beat it. But I wasn't diagnosed or on meds then so maybe this will help.
Oddly, I'm fairly calm. I know I made the right decision to come here, and even though things are frantic at this point, they will calm down. I need to get some resume paper so I can send out my resume to local answering services and call centers. The problem will be getting 15 hours, most places want their part-time workers to work 20, which I can't do. Every dollar I earn over a pre-set limit deducts TWO dollars from my disability...I'd be slitting my own throat!
I wish I could go back to work full time, but even working part time is going to be a major challenge. I can't sit in any chair but my soft recliner for any length of time, so I'll have to work between standing up and moving (standing still hurts like the devil), or sitting for short periods (no more than a half-hour). I know the expert at my Social Security hearing said I couldn't work at all, and that makes me feel useless, a burden to society, but I'm learning and growing. I can go back to school next year (OH requires 1 year residency before getting in-state tuition), and eventually I'll have my degree in a field I CAN work in. Of course, I'll be in my 60's, but it's important to me to be productive.
In general, I'm happy. I still hurt, but usually my stress level is pretty low here (except for the past few days...wonder if that triggered my manic?)
I miss my friends in IL. I've written back to everyone who wrote to me, in email or on Facebook.
Well, I guess that's it for now. I'll post before the end of the month and let you know if I'll have internet after the 30th.
I sure hope things worked out for you. I miss you and our rides on Sunday. Godd luck. I love you Carrie!
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